Milspouse Monday: Missing Out

January 29, 2018 No Comments

This is both a plea for forgiveness and a giant thank you for all my civilian friends. I’m looking at you, and I am so thankful for you. One of the hardest things for me in this crazy milspouse life might not be the most obvious. I’ve gotten used to the leaving and it doesn’t make me lose my mind like it once did. I think at the stage the kids are in we are busier, they “need” us less, and they are sleeping through the night {can I get an amen?}.

The thing that is the hardest about #militarylife isn't what you think it is - the leaving I'm used to - its the missing out that I'm not Click To Tweet

For me the hardest part is missing out. We’ve really grown a life here, more so than any other place that we’ve been. We are all happy, which is crazy!!! The kids are loving school and adjusted, hubby is loving his job, and I’ve got stuff. It’s amazing!! So when I have to miss out on events, parties, get-togethers it kills me a little bit inside. This isn’t just a byproduct of my military life. My personality is largely to blame. As a self-described sanguin I thrive on being around people. Lock me in the house for a couple days and I’ve become a shadow of the person I once was. I say things like “can we just go to the library as a family?” or “can we all go to Cost-Co together?” constantly to me sweet and adoring husband. I’m comfortable around large groups, comfortable in taking the lead – all good qualities. The downside is that when I don’t get out, don’t see people I fall apart a little inside. I withdraw and feel alone. I worry constantly that these people don’t like me anymore, that somehow in the rat race of life they’ve decided that me missing an event or two means that I obviously hate them and their only recourse is not be my friend anymore. It’s insanity!! If they don’t reach out to me it must be over. Another part of my personality is that of “The Reacher”. A topic I’ve discussed before, and one that is close to my heart.

Life isn’t a one-way road!

I’m constantly feeling like I’m the reacher! I’m the texter, the caller, the get-together put together-er {its a word, I’ve decided}. I know that its mostly in my head, but its a very real feeling. To feel like you’re the one moving the friendship along. That if I suddenly stopped texting and calling said person I’d never hear from them again. And while that may be true in some cases, I know its not for everyone. I tell myself I should just chill. Calm the heck down Rheanna!! But I usually don’t do a very good job. And while I’m able to keep my anxiety at bay most of the time these day, it is during these times when military life has reared its ugly head that my anxiety does also.

So to all my civilian, and military friends, THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart. For being in my life, for dealing with the crazy, and for being understanding. I make a plea for myself and for all the military spouses you might know that many of us feel this way. And we ask, so very selfishly, to not forget about us. When we can’t go somewhere, or do something, don’t forget about us. Keep inviting us, keep showing up in our lives. Because you know what happens if you do? You’ll get on of the most loyal and steadfast friends you could find. We will be there in a moment’s notice. We know how to rally the troops, get a meal chain going, load of the kids at all hours and head over to your house. We welcome you in to crash on the couch, we’ll feed you amazing meals and just be there for you. It might not always be easy being our friend, but I promise that in the end we think its worth it!

Deployment, military, military life, milspouse

A New Year, A New Me and a New You! {MilSpouse Wellness Summit}

January 7, 2018 No Comments

I’m about a week late to the party. The obligatory “New Year’s” post that one must publish when you’re a blogger. My new me was postponed when I promptly became sick on January 2nd. It’s now a week later and I’m still sick, having transitioned from some sort of fever virus to a sinus infection. Murphy has moved in forever apparently. But I’ve got big plans for 2018! Along with the obvious resolutions – move more, eat better, be present – I’m excited to kick off the year with goal of self-care. I think most moms can relate to this. Your life is about your family and your children and self-care falls somewhere at the very end of the list when your children are asleep.

How do you practice ‘self-care’ when you are a busy mom, solo-parenting a lot of the time, and with a lot on your plate? First thing you can do is register for the Military Spouse Wellness Summit 2018! I’m so excited for this virtual summit. This will be my third summit, and it is always an amazing experience. You can join me and fellow military spouses, military girlfriends, wives of firefighters and police officers, as we join together in a united goal of taking care of ourselves. The MSWS will focus on full-body, all inclusive health – mind, body and soul. And as cheesy as that might sound, the organizers behind thing amazing summit know what they are doing.

Host, Corie Weathers, a licensed professional counselor, will take us through our week-long journey of wellness. Joined by guests like Laura Casey, reserve spouse, founder of Southern Weddings and Write the Word Journals; Tiffany Smiley, Caregiver spouse and founder of Hope Unseen and Jess Atkins, founder of the StyleBook app, a virtual closest organizer, I guarantee you will have an amazing experience. Find balance, tools to prevent the burnout – all things that I need to be reminded of my life.

I’ve shared my story many times on this blog, giving snippets of my life a little at a time. Everyone’s military life is unique and mine is no exception. At times it is rough and each year is different. 2018 is going to be one of those rough years I think, but my hope is that this summit sets things up so that I have the tools to cope with things that life throws at me. I know it won’t be perfect, but what I do know is that with my family, friends and faith will help carry me through.

Register for the Summit here! General admission is free, VIP registrations are still available. TODAY is the last day to receive 65% off with code: TRIBE

military, milspouse, milspouse stories

Sometimes It Isn’t Easy….And I Probably Won’t Admit It

February 21, 2017 No Comments

I play the “I’ve got it card” a lot! It’s my jam. When your spouse is gone what seems like all the darn time you get tired of saying that it’s hard. People say, “Oh that must be hard,” and you slap a smile on your face and say that you’ve got it. Thank you for your sympathy and probably sometimes your pity. When I hit that three week mark, right before the stride of our new rhythm kicks in, is when you see me. I’m probably frazzled, ordering take-out and making peanut butter and jelly because the thought of going to grocery store actually makes me want to cry ugly tears. I probably smiled and said something like, “oh, you know we’re making it through.” Right now, one of my friend’s reading this is probably laughing hysterically because I have in fact said that to them.

Photo Credit ~ Gronde Photography

But sometimes its not easy. You tell me that its okay for me to admit its not, and I hear you, but admitting that to myself isn’t something that is easy for me to do. It’s like flood gates on a dam. Once you open them its incredibly difficult to close them. When I didn’t have children I found it much easier to be mope about, but these days its harder. I want so much for my children, for them to be happy and not be filled with worry and sadness. Their whole lives have been this way, they know nothing different. We have an open home when it comes to their father’s career. We allow them the freedom to talk about how they feel, to cry and to be angry. There is no secret when mommy is sad, but I want to give them security and peace as best that I can.

So, yes, sometimes it isn’t easy. It is very very hard. And I know its asking a lot to expect you to know that without me having to tell you….but sometimes that is how it has to be. I hate to place that burden on you as a civilian friend, or even as my another military spouse. But sometimes the thought of admitting what is really going on, or having a conversation about it is just too much to deal with.

Sometimes it isn’t easy, and I probably won’t admit it

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care packages, military, milspouse, The Six Box

The Six Box ~ Care Packages for Military Spouses

August 4, 2016 No Comments

I am so excited to share this with you all today! I stumbled across The Six Box on Instagram one day and I knew that I absolutely had to see what it is all about. A care package for military spouses. I love it!! The ladies over at The Six Box sent me their August box and I’m in love. This box is adorable and fun and I can see myself absolutely sending this box out to girlfriends that need a little pick me up for whatever reason – deployment, TDY, or just regular military life craziness. Founded by military spouses and made with them in mind, make this a wonderful business to support. Megan and Alana are two amazing women that have worked hard for this and Cammo Style Love is proud to support them!!

So, lets check out what is in August’s box!

Look at this box! So fun right?

~ Evian Mineral Water Facial Spray – I’d never heard of this before. Apparently flight attendants use it quite frequently. I love that you can spray it over your make-up to refresh your face; but using it after cleansing your face is where it really makes a difference. Gently moisturizing and cleansing your face. Crazy right?

~ Sugar Goop Sun Defying Sunscreen Oil – It was about a year ago that I started using cleansing oil that I got from Julep. Again, another weird thing that I never used before, new existed, or even expected to work well. Who thought a ‘tanning oil’ would actually work as a sunscreen. And it smells good too!!

~ Boom Chica Pop Kettle Corn : two words – Yum Yum!

~ Happy Tatts Metallic Chevron Temporary Tattoos – Do you guys remember Swarovski crystal tattoos? Oh my gosh I wore them all the time and they were my favorite!! So this really brought back the memories. I haven’t busted them out yet because I’m really looking for the right opportunity. Make sure you are following me on Instagram so you can see them when I finally bust them out!!

~ Summertime Lyrics Print – Beautiful print that I’m currently hunting for the right frame for because it’s going right up on the wall in my bathroom!

~ August 2016 Journal – This is probably my most favorite part of the box. It is a unique and special little thing. A small journal just for the month of August. The focus of this month’s box is savoring summer. What better way to do that than journaling. I’ve been writing in a journal for years…decades really. I love it and it always makes me feel better. I have vivid memories of sobbing over the pages of my journal, getting the words out of my heart and onto paper. It was such a cathartic thing. This sweet journal is full of great writing prompts and encouraging words.

Pick up your SixBox for $39.95 and spoil yourself

or someone special in your life! Whose got your Six? Maybe this is the perfect way to thank them? Who would you give it to

if you could send one box? Let me know!!

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military, milspouse, podcast, True Crime

10 Podcasts You Should Be Listening To {and I dream of being a guest on}

May 23, 2016 No Comments

Podcasts are my new addiction. I’ve always been the kind of person that needed to have ‘noise’ around me, whether that be the tv, music or just sitting out in the middle of the house while the kids are running around. Silence drives me nuts! So really, listening to podcasts are the perfect way to have ‘noise’ going on around me. There’s no reason for me to look up at the tv, and a smaller chance of getting distracted – oh look, something shiny!!! There is also this little part of me that loves the concept of listening to my entertainment. I remember as a kid listening to the radio with my parents. Talk radio, Adventures in Odyssey, and an A.M. station that used to recreate old-time radio shows. Love!! Podcasts to me are as close as we can get to the days of radio entertainment right? So grab a cup of coffee and sit back and listen to some amazing podcasts.

Not only have I fallen in love with so many podcasts, I have secret dreams of being on all of them as a guest star. And if perhaps, some of these amazing podcast would love to a fan-girl segment I’d be okay with that. But no, seriously…..I could figure out something to say, maybe. I have, in fact, been on one podcast and it was such a lovely experience, and really put a bee in my bonnet. All right, so on to the list!!

1. Gilmore Guys

I’m a Gilmore Girls addict, and you might frequently hear me quote lines from it even if I’m talking to people who are not GG fans. You can catch my post about GG, where I talk about how it may or not may not affect how I raise my daughter. This is a longer podcast, one of the longer ones on the list. So just be ready for that. You’ll love it and the time will fly by!{language}

2. The Lively Show

Jess Lively is just so fun to listen to. Her podcast really is a lively, uplifting and positive podcast for women. There is so much fun and good discussion. I just love it and almost don’t want to go into any more detail because you just have to listen to it.

3. Elise Gets Crafty

The woman behind the Get To Work Book (for all you paper planner nerds like me) podcasts here. This is a great podcast because it talks a lot of what real entrepreneurship and success looks like – which is so subjective. And that’s kind of the point. There are so many different kinds of things that can make you an entrepreneur, and many more things that make someone successful. You can find podcasts about authors, blogging, travel photographers, finding your passions and more.

4. Real Crime Profile

So this is where my true crime nerdiness comes out. Most of the people that are currently in my life {post DC Metro Area move} do not know about my schooling and my life pre-kids. I have a degree in Criminal Justice and Psychology, focus of Criminal Psychology and dreamed of snagging an internship at the BAU. I had a cat named Luminol. This show is headed by Jim Clemente, who is a retired FBI profiler. Also on the show is the casting director for Criminal Minds (who works with Jim – he’s a writer on the show) and Laura Richards, who worked with Scotland Yard and founded an international stalking advocacy group. So, its some amazing people. {intense topics}

5. Lifegiver: A Military Spouse podcast

This podcast is hosted by Corie Weathers (and a lot of the times her sweet sweet hubby), who was the 2015 Armed Force Insurance Military Spouse of the Year. This has been such a wonderful podcast for me, and if I had to rate the podcasts this might rate pretty close to being the top. I have been so encouraged and moved to tears during this podcast. It has offered perspectives on marriage, words of advice and validation. It has challenged me in my faith. I’m feeling emotional just writing this description. Even if you aren’t a military spouse I feel like this would be an excellent podcast. Corie is a Licensed Professional Counselor and is married to an Army Chaplain.

6. The Way I heard It, with Mike Rowe

This is the shortest podcast on the list. Running on an average of 8 minutes you will hear about stories in politics, pop culture and entertainment from a different perspective with the words of the amazing Mike Rowe. And, its Mike Rowe, so I’m not really sure what else you need to know.

7. Probably Wrong Podcast

Two dudes talking about music, culture, faith and beyond…is the description of this podcast…and its about accurate. Although its way less formal sounding than it is. I’m biased on this one only because I know these guys and they have a special plate in my heart. Its really funny, thought provoking, maybe a little hot topic like. But the best part about it is they’re “Probably wrong!” See what I did there? {language}

8. Pulp: the podcast based on a true story

This is an interesting podcast. It started out talking about The People Vs. OJ Simpson, then they’ve talked about other crime related things like Anita Hill, The Bling Ring…so crime, but through a pop culture lens…by young Millennials? I’m not really sure how else to describe it. They know their stuff, they read, they watch, and somehow it works. There’s been a couple times that I’ve laughed because they don’t remember the OJ Simpson trial like I do. Its a fun listen. {language}{intense topics}

9. A Purpose Driven Wife Podcast

So this is one of the podcasts on my list that I have actually been on! Yay! So make sure you find my episode and listen. But Trista is so lovely. Its uplifting, its real, its funny. She is such an encouragement to women, whether that be by faith, by her drive in entrepreneurship avenues, blogging. She’s even written a book. You can find topics relating to motherhood, military life, business and faith.

10. She Percolates

This is THE first podcast I ever listened to. I am lucky enough to have met one of the lovely ladies on this podcast {plus she’s my go to fashion guru – because of her I now am confident in my pattern mixing ability!} way before podcasting. We worked together in the military non-profit world, her working/me volunteering, for the same organization. So when she announced this whole podcast thing I was fascinated. And its amazing. The description describes it as a podcast, “serving up a fresh perspective on success” and its true. Its empowering and encouraging, uplifting and fun. The hosts personalities really come out through their conversations and its a fun listen.

bonus podcasts!!!!

so i added two bonus podcasts to my list, because, well….I can!!

When I was making my list I just found that I couldn’t narrow things down like I had originally wanted to. So I just thought, well this is how its happening now! So I have two bonus podcast choices for you.

1. NextGen Milspouse – This is a military driven podcast that talks about issues in and around the military community. There are tips and advice and so much more. what I really love about this podcast and what I think really makes it unique is that it isn’t just about being a milspouse. And I think that is something that is true for the NextGen brand as a whole. They have a great online magazine/blog format, and that really translates well into podcast form.

2. We Are the Mighty Podcast – They have had some really good interviews – Noah Galloway and Bryan Anderson, and I just think the guys are funny. The episodes about POWs and the best characters in military movies were pretty good as well. I’m pretty sure talking to a lame Air Force military spouse would be low on their list…but I think they are hilarious. Their podcast can run a bit long sometimes, but they are just starting out. {language}

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