Eight things ‘Gilmore Girls’ Taught Me About Raising a Daughter

1. Making up phrases together creates a bond Don’t worry, I’m waiting for the perfect moment to bring out my ‘Copper Boom!’ and my ‘Oiy with the poodles already,’ in a perfect synchronization that only an amazing mother/daughter duo can have.

2. When your daughter is the reason two boys get into a fight…sing. If there’s anything we’ve learned from watching Gilmore Girls all these years its that sometimes you have deal with things with a little quip or two. One of my favorite instances of this is when Lorelei finds out that Rory was the cause of the big fight at Kyle’s house. Instead of pushing her, reprimanding her, she simply breaks out into a Bette Middler tune. I mean, come on guys….its epic!

3. Even if you make a mistake, you gotta be honest with your kids. We have only a couple real times in the life of Gilmore Girls that we saw Lorelei let Rory know what was what. When she decided to sleep with a married Dean and when she got drunk on Miss Patty’s Founder’s Day Punch because of Logan. I hope with all that is in me that I never have to face those types of situations with my daughter, but if I do, I hope I’m able to say whats needed to be said. She may not hear me, and may need to figure it out on her own, but if I do it right she’ll know I’ll always be there for her no matter what.

4. A little embarrassment never hurt anyone. Not much to add here…because you know, what parent didn’t embarrass us? Lorelei did it flair….

5. Know where to get college memorabilia in a hurry. When your kid has had their heart set on one college for their entire lives, and suddenly through a hilarious and not so hilarious set up circumstances you know that they really belong elsewhere…..well, lets just say its time to put aside your own feelings and back your kid 100%. So make sure you live with in driving distance or a store that sells that kind of stuff, so even before you have the actual “I changed my mind” conversation you deck their room out with all new stuff. Instant bonding right? And this is applicable to so much in life right? Sometimes our kids are going to do things that maybe we didn’t have in mind. Play a sport we never wanted them to play, go to a school far away from us. But its up to us to encourage that. I only hope when push comes to shove I can do that.

6. If you’re going to throw your life away, make sure there’s a motorcycle involved. In the pilot episode Rory all of the sudden could care less about going to Chilton, something she’d wanted to for awhile {we can only assume}. But that adorable boy with the flippy hair came swooping in from Chicago and almost muddled up the whole plans. But Lorelei pulls her mom card and says there’s no way that’s happening. Thankfully, we don’t have to wonder how things would have turned out; and we wouldn’t have had the joy of knowing Paris!

7. The importance of acting like a lady. 

8. You really can be best friend’s with your daughter. I didn’t really need Gilmore Girls to teach me this because my own mama and I are really close! It’s possible and I’m so grateful that it is. I really hope that I’m able to have that with my daughter. 
And because I’m so sad….but hopefully all will be redeemed with the reboot right? One can only hope.

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Making the Most Of Winter Break

“This post was provided by SpouseLink. SpouseLink is a free website for Military Spouses that was created to support, inform and inspire users with a variety of content–anything from pop culture to important Military information. SpouseLink.org was created by AAFMAA, a non-profit, membership association that supports the American Armed Forces community with affordable insurance and widow survivor assistance services.”



What to do, what to do? The holidays are here and so are your kids, thanks to school closures over Winter Break. For some families, this is a very welcome time of togetherness that they look forward to all year long, especially for military spouses if it includes time spent with loved ones who are usually not at arm’s length. For others, having the kids home and constantly under foot — and possibly trapped indoors after a snowfall — can make cold, gray winter days seem unending.
So, how can all of you fill your time without driving each other crazy? Here are ten ideas to help you inspire minds, both young and old, when you’re all together.
·         Enjoy the splendor of winter. Bundle up and go outside for a walk, sledding or to build a snowman. While you’re out there, take in all the sights, sounds and scents of the winter season — the bright colors of winter birds, the homespun smell of smoke from a crackling fireplace, the twinkling of holiday lights on houses, and the subtle, heartwarming scent of pine trees.
·         Make holiday ornaments. Salt dough ornaments are classically kid-friendly and can be shaped with cookie cutters or by hand, capturing handprints for the years to come. Leave them as is for a natural look, paint them to match your décor, or apply glue and sprinkle them with glitter. You can even think ahead to the next holiday by making heart-shaped ornaments to hang in Febrary.
·         Watch a holiday movie marathon. Choose your favorite movies (they don’t have to be holiday-related), whip up some hot cocoa, gather a plate of fresh-baked cookies from the kitchen, snuggle up under a warm blanket on the couch, and press “Play”.
·         Write thank-you notes. Remember all those gifts you’ve just received? Even if you opened them in the presence of the gift-giver, think how special they will feel opening their mailbox to find a handwritten (or at least a hand-packaged) thank-you note from you — not to mention, if you live far away from the person you’re thanking, they will have fun seeing the postmark and stamp on the envelop. And your kids will be admired for their good habit of gratefulness.
·         Clean the house. No, it’s not the most “fun” thing on this list, but just think how you’ll feel in the New Year knowing your house is clean! Everyone can be responsible for de-cluttering their own space on Day 1. On Day 2, tackle any other rooms that need a touch-up — working individually or as a team. On Day 3, reward yourself with a meal made by all… or just kick back and relax, enjoying the refreshed space you’ve created!
·         Shop the after-holiday sales. Yes, heading off to the stores with kids in tow can be an adventure in itself, but if you plan to make a day of it, you can come out in the end with a smiles on everyone’s faces. First, decide where you want to shop and agree to only purchase items you reallyneed. Pre-purchase movie tickets so you have a shopping deadline and scheduled chill-out time. Afterward, get back out in the shops again, if everyone’s still game, or head home to review your new treasures.
·         Snap photos of each other. Catch the moments that usually get missed. Hand off your camera or cell phone or tablet to each member of the household for a few minutes at a time. It will be interesting to see what their individual perspectives are: Mom cooking from the point of view of the floor; Baby crawling from the point of view of standing on top of a chair; Dad shoveling snow from the upside-down point of view of a sled. Etc.
·         Let the kids plan and make dinner. Have your little one choose a cuisine (e.g., Italian), make up a menu and decorate the kitchen table as though it’s a restaurant. No need to buy anything special for these activities. Use what you have or make it with supplies on-hand. It’s a great way to inspire kids in the kitchen, help them learn to cook, encourage their crafty creativity, and practice their handwriting skills. (And they will just think it’s for fun.)
·         Sort clothes and shoes. Wintertime is a great time to go through drawers and closets to determine which summer clothes no longer fit — or won’t fit when summer comes around again. Drop the ones you no longer need or want into a donation box for the nearest thrift store and throw away anything that isn’t in good condition. You’ll feel good knowing you’ve gotten rid of things that can no longer be used, and create space for new ones.

·         Keep in touch. Haven’t seen your best friend in a while? Are your kids longing to see their school buddies? Set up a lunch date, phone call, or Skype chat for yourself, and play dates for them. It will give all of you the one-on-one “me” time you’re looking for at a time when everyone, just like you, is wondering how to fill up their Winter Break days.

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Dear Santa…..I Believe

It’s a gloomy day here in Northern Virginia. I’m sitting here with my daughter, snuggled up watching The Polar Express. Its at the part where the little kids sing “When Christmas Comes to Town,” and I’m fighting back the tears.

Dear Santa, I believe.

I believe in the joy and love you stand for. For the innocence and tradition you represent. The astonishing number of people who don’t believe baffles my mind. They don’t believe because they think your represent all that wrong with our world today – greed, selfishness and commercialism. You’ve come to represent a lie we tell our children, that you’re real and that you deliver presents to them. We tell our children the words of the song we have sung for years, “You better watch out, you better not cry. You better not pout, I’m telling you why. Santa Claus is coming to town.” You won’t come if we’ve been naughty. And now we’ve lied to our children. Telling them that only if they are good will they get presents. How can our children believe anything we say once they find out the truth?

But I believe and I want my children to. Sure, my oldest two know that its only the magic of you that exists, that mommy and daddy put the presents out. But they have joy and happiness, and the benefit they get from keeping that magic alive, and the magic alive in their little brother.

There is so little joy and innocence left in this world. True and pure joy is hard to come by. Our world is tough, and so much hate and sadness exists. One by one our children are being stripped of all that makes them children. Imagination and play isn’t flourishing as it once was. And Santa I think you represent all those things. Some may argue that my faith should stop me from the ‘lie’ that you are. But I don’t think that you are that far removed from faith. Its true that St. Nicholas was a real person, and that he left coins and small gifts for the children of believers who left their shoes out. Each country and generation has added more to their Legend of Santa, and what Bishop Nicholas was is probably so far removed from what you become. But everything about you is a model of what we should be to our families, to our community and to the world.

In recent years I could feel myself become ashamed to say we believed. In a moment that has still stuck with me I was publicly teased by an adult, subtle as it was, for the use of you during Christmas. My belief in you is calling into question my faith in God, simply by the overwhelming amount of Christians I know that have made a choice to include you in the festivities. I never once judged someone for not including you, but every year I feel judged. I am conflicted. Is what I’m doing wrong? Will I get to heaven and be put to task for including you in our lives? I don’t know.

But I do know that like that little boy in The Polar Express that lived his whole life hearing that bell. I never want to stop hearing it. And I hope my children never do either. That bell, to me, symbolizes more than just you, flying with reindeer bring me presents. It symbolizes love, joy, innocence, peace, thankfulness, giving and sharing.

I hope I always hear it.
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Four Ways to Pretend You’re Surviving the Toddler Years

They’re so much fun right?  I’m convinced the “terrible twos” is a phrase we moms use to not completely go crazy and call them devil children.  “Oh he’s just going through his terrible twos,” is something I find myself saying.  Although I’m not sure if I’m saying it to the people who are giving me weird looks, or two myself.  Either way I’m saying it, loud and proud.  On Sunday I had an encounter with a sweet mama in the hallways of church.  She was dropping off her older son, and her sweet and adorable three year old was hiding in a little doorway alcove screaming her head off.  The mom looked slightly frazzled and I looked at her with a knowing smile.  The first thing she said to me was, “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with her.” I laughed and said, “been there, done that, and doing again with my two year old.”  I gave her a little squeeze on her arm and said, “you’re not alone.”

The first “mistake” she made was saying “I don’t know what’s wrong with her!”  Please raise your virtual hand if you’ve done this.  I know I have, and you aren’t raising your hand then you’re totally lying! So what do you do to pretend you’re surviving?  After having three kids I can officially say I’m getting better at these younger years.  Don’t get me wrong…I’m totally clueless about what’s coming up.  That is for my friends with older kids to sort of figure out and then clue me in on thanks Sarah (go buy some of her amazing purses and accessories at Hands Full Creations – she has three boys between the ages of like 8 and 11..help a sister out.

1) Don’t say you don’t know what’s wrong with them.  The absolutely best way to handle to survive anything that comes your way in parenting is speak the truth!  can i get a witness!!??!!  Say, “my child is currently going crazy,” or “if I wasn’t out I’d be hiding in the closet eating frosting right out of the container,” something along those lines.

 photo photo3_zps471378d5.jpg
 crying because he would rather drink juice all day long then water

2) Learn the power of ignoring.  Find your inner mom zen.  Now whether you do that by busting out the yoga mat while your child is screaming in the other room, yelling “mommies going to take a shower” and then secretly locking yourself in there while the shower is running and playing candy crush, or eating frosting right out of the container.  Find your mom zen and ignore the fit.  It’s parenting gold I tell you.  For the most part kids will react to any attention you give them, whether it be good or bad.  They also know you’re mom, they totally have your number and know how to push the buttons.  Case in point, my kids almost always behave better while with friends or babysitters.  I’m talking, “oh my gosh, Brian is the sweetest, quietest, most respectful child I have ever seen!!”  I’m sorry, who are speaking of?  Don’t get me wrong, for the most part he’s all those things; but the last time we had a friend out I was literally telling him, “please don’t act like this, your friend is going to go home and tell his mom how crazy I am!!”  I later fount out that she was secretly thinking the same thing when my kid was other there.  So back to number one, talk about it!!!

 photo photo2_zpsb41411b4.jpg
 crying because his sister in on his side instead of going around

3) Girls night/date nights:  Do it, do it now, do it often.  Coffee dates, dinner dates, dragging all the kids to Chick-Fil-A and then sending them all to the play area and praying they stay in…do it!!  Talk about how crazy your kid is being, and if you’re hanging out with the right people then they will probably start doing the same.  I love spending time with adults, but seriously who wants to spend time with someone who pretends their kid literally never does anything wrong.  This chick ain’t got no time for that!  And since when did grocery shopping at 9 o’clock at night become the best thing ever?  I hate sacrificing time with the hubby, but for this I’ll do it.  Find some good friends to swap kids with so you’re not paying for sitters all the time and go out!  Heck, go out on double dates!  Just do it!!

 photo photo1_zpsd8026752.jpg
crying because he can’t put his shoes on the right feet

The best thing about my little guy is on top of all the crazy he is the sweetest, most loving, best hug giver and cuddlier.  He does everything with extreme passion.  So that leads to my final thought….

4) enjoy the snuggles, the giggles, the hugs.  Relish in the moments when he picks up his toys, puts his dishes in the sink, goes potty like a big boy and plays well with his siblings.  That is really the secret to getting through the rest of it.

and just because I’m nice, I thought you’d like to see my latest video “Real Tales of Motherhood: Phil Phil wants my coffee.”

Do you have a toddler, or a crazy kid?!  Tell me all about it!?  Or do you have a tip? I’d love to hear it!
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Four Ways to Pretend You’re Surviving the Toddler Years

They’re so much fun right?  I’m convinced the “terrible twos” is a phrase we moms use to not completely go crazy and call them devil children.  “Oh he’s just going through his terrible twos,” is something I find myself saying.  Although I’m not sure if I’m saying it to the people who are giving me weird looks, or two myself.  Either way I’m saying it, loud and proud.  On Sunday I had an encounter with a sweet mama in the hallways of church.  She was dropping off her older son, and her sweet and adorable three year old was hiding in a little doorway alcove screaming her head off.  The mom looked slightly frazzled and I looked at her with a knowing smile.  The first thing she said to me was, “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with her.” I laughed and said, “been there, done that, and doing again with my two year old.”  I gave her a little squeeze on her arm and said, “you’re not alone.”

The first “mistake” she made was saying “I don’t know what’s wrong with her!”  Please raise your virtual hand if you’ve done this.  I know I have, and you aren’t raising your hand then you’re totally lying! So what do you do to pretend you’re surviving?  After having three kids I can officially say I’m getting better at these younger years.  Don’t get me wrong…I’m totally clueless about what’s coming up.  That is for my friends with older kids to sort of figure out and then clue me in on thanks Sarah (go buy some of her amazing purses and accessories at Hands Full Creations – she has three boys between the ages of like 8 and 11..help a sister out.

1) Don’t say you don’t know what’s wrong with them.  The absolutely best way to handle to survive anything that comes your way in parenting is speak the truth!  can i get a witness!!??!!  Say, “my child is currently going crazy,” or “if I wasn’t out I’d be hiding in the closet eating frosting right out of the container,” something along those lines.

 photo photo3_zps471378d5.jpg
 crying because he would rather drink juice all day long then water

2) Learn the power of ignoring.  Find your inner mom zen.  Now whether you do that by busting out the yoga mat while your child is screaming in the other room, yelling “mommies going to take a shower” and then secretly locking yourself in there while the shower is running and playing candy crush, or eating frosting right out of the container.  Find your mom zen and ignore the fit.  It’s parenting gold I tell you.  For the most part kids will react to any attention you give them, whether it be good or bad.  They also know you’re mom, they totally have your number and know how to push the buttons.  Case in point, my kids almost always behave better while with friends or babysitters.  I’m talking, “oh my gosh, Brian is the sweetest, quietest, most respectful child I have ever seen!!”  I’m sorry, who are speaking of?  Don’t get me wrong, for the most part he’s all those things; but the last time we had a friend out I was literally telling him, “please don’t act like this, your friend is going to go home and tell his mom how crazy I am!!”  I later fount out that she was secretly thinking the same thing when my kid was other there.  So back to number one, talk about it!!!

 photo photo2_zpsb41411b4.jpg
 crying because his sister in on his side instead of going around

3) Girls night/date nights:  Do it, do it now, do it often.  Coffee dates, dinner dates, dragging all the kids to Chick-Fil-A and then sending them all to the play area and praying they stay in…do it!!  Talk about how crazy your kid is being, and if you’re hanging out with the right people then they will probably start doing the same.  I love spending time with adults, but seriously who wants to spend time with someone who pretends their kid literally never does anything wrong.  This chick ain’t got no time for that!  And since when did grocery shopping at 9 o’clock at night become the best thing ever?  I hate sacrificing time with the hubby, but for this I’ll do it.  Find some good friends to swap kids with so you’re not paying for sitters all the time and go out!  Heck, go out on double dates!  Just do it!!

 photo photo1_zpsd8026752.jpg
crying because he can’t put his shoes on the right feet

The best thing about my little guy is on top of all the crazy he is the sweetest, most loving, best hug giver and cuddlier.  He does everything with extreme passion.  So that leads to my final thought….

4) enjoy the snuggles, the giggles, the hugs.  Relish in the moments when he picks up his toys, puts his dishes in the sink, goes potty like a big boy and plays well with his siblings.  That is really the secret to getting through the rest of it.

and just because I’m nice, I thought you’d like to see my latest video “Real Tales of Motherhood: Phil Phil wants my coffee.”

Do you have a toddler, or a crazy kid?!  Tell me all about it!?  Or do you have a tip? I’d love to hear it!
post signature
If you like what you just read please click to send a quick vote for me on Top Mommy Blogs- The best mommy blog directory featuring top mom bloggers

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